With sucess .....there is always disappointment.....

I just realized my welcome back post was actually ....... my 100th post!!!!

I'm a little disappointed that it wasn't everything I always thought it would be...you know like your 21st birthday, or buying a new car. I suppose I'll manage to get through it....some how we always find the will to keep moving on!


Godspeed my good friends!

I'm back...BIGGER & better THEN EVER.....

I'm sure all of my faithful reader have wonder where the hell I've been hiding the past 6 or so weeks..... the answer..... In the unemployment line!

Yes, just as the country started to make some wonderful and exciting changes we also headed straight towards the great recession. I am one of the 22% of unemployed individuals who contribute to making my city one of the fastest dying cities in America ...at least according to Forbes Magazine. However, that's something we've known for a while.....and we surely didn't need them telling EVERYONE ELSE! So thanks a lot Forbes!!!

Moving on to BIGGER & BETTER news.

It looks as though I've gained a new audience of readers during my absence! Welcome Mr. & Mrs. BIGWOOD!! I'm pleased to have you join us because your daily visits only increase my viewer totals....which in return makes my page that much stronger. So thank you deeply for your stalking....I mean patronage! Since the two of you think finding my blog was some kind of extravagant treasure, let's just say I've known all along that one day you would find me here and you're foolish to believe otherwise. I'm just wondering "what the hell took you so long"? However your devious plans to black mail me with my personal opinion has unfortunately been foiled! Let it be known that Senior BIGWOOD knows about this page, for I have already shown him myself! So please feel free to show him any "paper copies" you claim to have in your possession.....I actually wish that you would. I will tell you that it's very gratifying to know that having you read my words... The Words of Truth.... shows that you are not to far gone and you still have a chance of breaking your spell of lies and deceit.

As for my other more favorable readers....thank you sticking with me! Over the last few weeks I've collected many wonderful stories to share with you. Including but certainly not limited to:

• Successfully potty training in only 4 days
• GG visit with Santa Claus
• TPG's BIG WINNER
• My daily life as a SAHM

Updates coming REAL soon!

Did I mention how much I missed you guys? I really did....at least most of you!

New sidebar crap.....

Don't forget to check out my newest entry on the sidebar, "100 Things About Me".
You may or may not be surprised by what I admitted openly about myself....but I had a lot of fun doing it! It's nostalgic to think back about my childhood. Be sure to let me know if there is something you want to hear more about in a post!

My Transformation.....

I'm finished with my Blogger makeover. I was going to use a template from a site....blah, blah, blah but that shit is insanely confusing. That's unfortunate because I can actually read & alter HTML codes surprisingly well for not having any formal training.

As you already know, I'm lazy... so I just changed a few colors here and there and added a few thing "ghetto style" and *poof*....it's done and I'm satisfied for now. At least until I take the time to read some direction and quit thinking I'm actually smarter that I really am.

The most important thing...... I feel pretty!

Under Construction.....

I've decided to give myself a makeover.

It's not like you'll really even notice...unless you're one of my 4 readers. It's just that I'm pissed off today and I want to feel pretty instead!

So hang in there....it shouldn't take forever.....I hope!

Big Fat LOSER.....

Well, my million dollar, artificially whitened smile didn't get me the job! Which is a very important life lesson to my inspiring young future corporate-americans out there. ALWAYS show cleavage and pray to the good lord above that your future boss is a man but most importantly a pervert!

Surprisingly enough I'm not even disappointed about it. I mean sure it was my ticket back to the real corporate world, more money and something that would actually involve using my under stimulated brain cells but life goes on. I was dreading the long 30 minute drive (one way) every time I went back for an interview and that just means another hour away from GG each day. So, it was best that I ended up as #2 which you will hardly ever hear me say. When I followed up with them today, just as I told you I would, I was told they offered it to #1 and she gladly accepted.

I like to think that my starting salary was to high for them to justify and most likely exceeded the gal whom I interviewed with last. She and I were to be equal office leads, while assisting both salesmen. She admitted openly that my advanced computer skills exceeded hers and probably felt as thought I was a threat. However, it really could have been based on the fact that there is visual proof that I tend to wear helmets, or drink a little too much but probably because of my piss poor grammar and being over confident and a special Thanks to K'man over at 7 acres of heaven for pointing that out!

So charging ahead with enthusiasm, just as my geometry teacher Ms. McNaughtin always said.... I shall have far more time to spend with all of you guys!

Oh Hot Damn....

This is my jam.....we keeps it rockin until the a.m.

I have good reason for neglecting you the past few days. Well....it's not really a good one but I'll milk it if you let me!

Seriously, this is a post about my "Job". Yes...I have a real job even though I don't really do anything at it. Actually....I am at this said job right now....writing this blog, because I don't have a single thing to work on. I have to come in here every single weekday at 8am on the dot and not a nano-second late, to sit here and do nothing.....nothing but answer the phone a few times and "act" busy. How ridiculous is that! It's completely ridiculous because I frickin hate it! Well, I don't exactly hate it but it still kinda sucks!

My boss is extremely anal and organized. We're not just talking about the usual type of organization ...... but ..... the very fine line of OCD Organization! He's a frickin LOON when it comes to cleanliness, the way papers are stacked or how binders are labeled. He will even bust out the white glove dust check in my office to make sure I keep my area up to par. News flash to him.....I haven't dusted under my keyboard in a year!!!!! HA!! In your Face!!

You see, I once lived in the fast paced career world of "Corporate America". Hell.... I WAS CORPORATE AMERICA! I gave up a very lucrative and rewarding career as a Diamond Buyer in the Jewelry Industry shortly after I gave birth to GG. I was tried of the traveling, crazy work schedule and smoozing with the "riches". I enjoyed everything that I did and no one gave a rats ass about my dusty office! Being a Good Mama was far more important to me then any job. TPG and I decided it would good if I took a less stressful and demanding job to allow me more freedon and time to spend with GG. It worked out great because I was offered THIS JOB and I gladly accepted. There was a substantial pay cut but I get to unplug at 5pm and it's totally worth it!

Here's where the "Milking" starts.

I have been searching for a exciting new career. You see, last week was the final straw when I was publicly reprimanded for not answering ONE telephone call out of FOUR THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED SIXTY THREE of them that managed to pass through at the exact same time. I decided at that very moment "it was my time to leave" just sort of waiving the Johnny Cash salute and walking out the door!

I actually applied for another Executive Admin. position but later found out that I was selected for an interview based on my "buying experience". It's not a buying job at all and mostly administrative to get a foot in the door but I was pretty pumped up about going back into the corporate world and actually using my brain again. I had two interviews yesterday with the company executives which lasted 2 hours total. It went really well and we even discussed salary compensation...which never happens at a first meeting. This company is fairly new (14 yrs) and has been very successful considering it's a husband/wife team who started from scratch. It's also about a 30 min trip one way from home and I wasn't sure how I would care for that after the 1st week or so. Now, I am really getting excited about the position and hope to hear back from them in a few days.

Unfortunately, if I do get the job....I'll be blogging less. I know, it's hard to do any less blogging then I already do...but I promise to try my best to stay committed to you!

Wish me luck!

SCRRREEEECCCCHHHHH!!!!!!!

That devastating sound is me applying the breaks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As you know TPG are I are going toe to toe in round two this evening ......that was until about 10 minutes ago! I guess more practicing for at least 2 more months is in order. I am a little disappointed to say the least but I know it will be worth the wait.

It was recommended by my friend Malea to look into getting AFLAC coverage for my pregnancy & maternity leave. She had coverage for the birth of her 2nd son, which happened to be premature. Malea was pleased to tell me how the benefits were more then helpful during their tough time and extended NICU stay. I'm already an Accidental Policy holder but today decided to expand my coverage to include Hospital & Disability Benefits as well.

So what that means is that I can't get knocked up before November 1st 2008. My employer doesn't offer any maternity benefits to us. Probably because we're out numbered 14 ladies to 400 men and it doesn't really fit them to provided benefits to so few of us. Breaking it down to.... I get pregnant and take 8 weeks maternity leave without any supplemental income. This wouldn't really be a problem but I have a spending problem and 8 weeks off without pay would be detrimental to OUR savings account. Now granted, I could "save" a few extra bucks to get me through the tough times but we all know that's not going to happen.

So a big thanks to Malea for encouraging me to increase my AFLAC coverage & enjoy a few more weeks of Cherry Vodka.....I do need a little something to wash away my sorrows of pregnancy postponing!

AFLAC!

I'm turning 50 today!

I can hardly believe it!
50 post already!!!

Who knew I had so much shit to bitch about!!!!! Well, I'm sure those of you who know me are not impressed with my ability to talk, type or converse by any means necessary in order to have my voice heard.

So hang in there, if you're not completely bored out of your minds yet. Hopefully we'll turn 100 by the end of the summer!

Going Green'ish for some Green Backs.....

I have the hardest time with saying I'm going to do something & then actually following thought with real action. I believe that's why I truly am a "Procrastinating Perfectionist".

Since I stared blogging again, I've been reading a lot of blogs written by stay at home moms. I am also completely convinced that all bloggers fall under this category, with me as the exception. This is only because I blog while I'm at "work" and they pay me to do so....they just don't know it. A lot of the blogs I read are about surviving on a single income and making the most of the money they do have. I have started to take interest in this subject even thought we are not limited to a single income, but one day I may consider it. You see I like to work, use my brain, talk to people and have a productive adult life outside the home. I never pictured myself as the Stay-At-Home type. I mean I paid/still paying a lot of money for a college education and to think that it's all wasted money kind of bothers me.... but that's a personal opinion.

I decided to start changing the way I do things. Small changes of course. Some of these things actually make no sense to me right now but I hope in the long run I can see a difference with positive results. A few of my first resolves are listed below with detailed steps in how I plan to achieve them.

• Clipping Coupons - TPG does 100% of our grocery shopping and 99% of our cooking, and we eat at home A LOT! He actually despises taking GG & I to the grocery store with him because our bill almost doubles and we buy a lot of things that go unused or simply wasted. Today I subscribed to our local paper in order to get the Sunday advertisements and as long as I save $25 in the next 13 weeks, it was a pretty good idea. I plan to clip coupons for the items we already shop for at the local stores we already shop at. I know TPG doesn't want to be bothered with the task of coupons at the grocery so I'm planning on helping him by creating my famous "list" before going and sticking to it while we're there. I think we can really save a lot a money in trying something new like this.

• Free Grabber - I found this website on another blog and it instantly "grabbed" my attention. What a great way to get coupons and try new products for free. I've already signed up to get many free samples and you get to pick only the ones you're really interested in. I'll keep you posted on how this goes but you really should check it out for yourself.

• Save My Money - The only reason I truly have to work full time is because......I can't believe I'm actually saying it...... OUT LOUD ....... but I addicted to spend money. TPG and I still operate on separate bank accounts. Mostly because of this reason and how I feel that as long as I work that I should be in charge of my own finances. Now don't get me wrong, we do have several joint accounts that we both contribute funds that pay our household expenses. I used to call this "fun money" but I recently renamed it "the pot we both piss in". TPG is amazing with his his money and for that I am so thankful! It's just something I don't even have to worry about and it's a good feeling. That's how we compliment each other and never fight over money. He covers a large part of household expenses and I cover mine & GG's expenses. That kid cost me a fortune for the record. I know I could do better at pissing more into my personal pot and I'm challenging myself to do this.

• Going Green...or at least "Green'ish" - Going Green is such a commitment! I want to start doing a few easy things like recycling. We have a lot soda cans because.....well come on....... I am married to The Pepsi Guy and all, so disposing of my cans properly while making a nickel or two sounds like a win-win for everyone. I also think recycling the newspaper I just subscribed to would be a good idea. I can already hear him bitching about the paper laying all over the house after I clip the coupons & GG gets a hold of it!
  

Do my readers have any helpful but most importantly EASY suggestions on saving money and going green'ish that you'd like to share?

Cash in the attic.....

Apparently there is a show on HGTV called Cash in the Attic. It's safe to say that I recently had my very own non-televised experience with this concept. Where are the reality tv cameras and show producers when I need them!

I have often tried to get TPG to follow me around with our handy cam, you know to film random moments and experiences of my day. He's not really on board with that idea just yet!

Back to my story!

While we were having our garage sale this past weekend, TPG and Skinny decided it was a great opportunity to clean out our shed. This shed has acquired our junk since the day we moved into our house and it has never even been cleaned out......some 3 years later. It's a long story but the previous homeowners (now deceased) were quite the woodworkers and collectors of many thing. Mostly junk but there were a lot of neat tools and gadgets dated 4 decades or more. These treasures were left there for us when we became the new home owners. I've always tried to think of the shed as some sort of strange "house warming" gift from "The Old Man" as we often refer to the previous dead owner.

One of the treasures found during the cleaning of the shed was this really old chair. Skinny & Polly thought it may have some value to it but were unsure of what it was worth. It just looked old but still in really great structural shape. So, we put it in the garage sale at $50. Several people looked at the "high priced" item but there wasn't any real interest. We then decided to swap put the $50 price tag and replaced it with a "make offer" tag and still.......no takers.

I decided to do a little research on this particular chair to get a better idea of it's value. Who knows....we could have just been "sitting" on some junk. This is the information I found out after taking just a few pictures and posting them on this website for a free appraisal. Needless to say, I was more then pleased with what they had to say.

Here is my "Old Chair Found in Shed"

Can you believe it's from the 1850's-1860's and valued at nearly $100 in as is condition? It's really neat knowing that I have something so old in my possession that I didn't even know we had. We haven't really decided on what to do with our new treasure. I really think we're leaning towards selling it. We're most likely not going to restore the chair because that's rather expensive & time consuming. I think I would rather offer the chair to someone who would appreciate it's beauty far more then I ever could.

Any suggestion?

Let the count down BEGIN .....

Baby making season is just around the corner.

Consider this your Public Service Announcement.

I may have mentioned in an earlier post how the time has now come for the Guru's to spread our evil seed and once again reproduce. Yeah, as if GG wasn't enough evil offspring for this world.....we have chosen to offer you ..... yet another.

The Pepsi Guy & I have recently become aware that not every one plans out the pregnancies using such tools available like ovulation calendars, the internet or what ever else people plan with. You mean to tell me that people just get pregnant with out even trying.... or planning?!?!?! Okay, that's a joke but the reaction to planning such an event is often the same.

I like to make list, follow schedules, be prepared and these things alone take up a large part of my day but most importantly, they make happy. I'm also 30 now & I've waited long enough to do the family thing and I'm less likely to stall longer if I "add it to my list".

While we planned our pregnancy with GG, we used the ovulation calendar and experienced conception our first month of trying. We planned almost exactly when we wanted to have a baby & then she popped out & we were prepared because we planned. TPG & I both felt strongly about waiting until she was 2 yrs. old before we planned for a second child. Now, because GG can be and usually is such an asshole, I have reconsidered this thought many times. It just so happens to be that I am extremely fertile the weekend of her birthday, which is only days away. We have come to the conclusion that #2 has to be laid back and mellow or else it will be the death of me...... or God really hates me for having more children because one on them will probably be a theorist or something.

TPG & I have a wedding to attend on Saturday evening with an Open Bar. Apparently, alcohol also helps lower your inhibitions while at the same time increasing fertility..... so I've heard.

MySpace Countdowns

I feel as though I've neglected you.....

That's typically how I do things. I'll start by wooing you over with my charming demeanor, you realize that I'm smart & funny ....... and then you're hooked on me....... like I'm hooked on Intervention! However, I feel as though I've disappointed you with MY NEGLECT. I'm rather intimidated by the fact that I'm actually getting some what of a following of readers in the blogging nation and I FREEZE up under the pressure! Well, there's that & the fact that I've been extremely busy living life..... or what I like to call "collecting blogging material". I have several stories to share with you ..... so hang on to the seat of your pants because you'll need something to do with your hands besides pick you nose as I completely bore you!

So they call me the "Procrastinating Perfectionist"

I like to call myself a "Procrastinating Perfectionist". It's the best way I can explain the way I live my life. Unfortunate, I know but it's just the way I am. I have tried many times to change this "character flaw" but I have been nothing short of unsuccessful in my attempts of personal growth.

Here's a perfect example of my aforementioned statement, with the exception of the perfection so maybe it's just laziness.

TPG and I have planned for months and months to completely gut and remodel our master bathroom. We have a wonderful friend, I'll call Skinny who is doing the work for a fair price of practically nothing. In return, Skinny has asked us to do a little homework on the project to help ensure the process of the remodel is smooth & easy. However TPG & I didn't do our homework or any of the things that were asked of us & now we feel like ass-clowns!

Skinny wanted us to do the following:

• take before pictures
  
• pick out the materials (we started this one until GG acted like an asshole at Lowe's)
  
• select paint & flooring
• arrange for assistance with the tub install/leveling (original plans fell through, called in back up)
  
• have little or no expectations of perfection

It should be pretty obvious as to which of the listed chores I pretty much have under control! I believe in this particular situation that I have such low expectations ahead of time because the bathroom is already such a "shit hole" that any changes is bound to be an improvement!

Skinny is at the house now ripping the existing bath structure to shreds. TPG said he confident that Skinny is also wearing a pair of my thong panties on his head as a sweat band. Probably as retaliation for the lack of preparation on our part.

On a positive note, I hope to post pictures of our new lavatory very soon.